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Paul Abraham: 10 more tips on improving your emotional self care

By Paul Abraham of www.headingonwards.com

Following on from last week’s column here are ten more tips to help improve your self-emotions.

1. START A JOURNAL

I have written in the past about journaling to enable you to gain some clarity. If you feel like you get too caught up in emotions and can’t let them go, try making a regular habit of writing them down in your journal. You’d be surprised how beneficial journaling can be!

2. PRACTICE SELF-COMPASSION

One of the most important things you can do to care for yourself is to practice self-compassion. Become aware of the dialogue you have with yourself within your own head. Are you too hard on yourself?  If you find yourself constantly criticising yourself and using negative language, you need to switch it up and start treating yourself with the respect that you want from others. A great way to start is by turning a negative in to a positive, such as “I’m useless at …………” change it in to “I’m getting better and starting to enjoy ……….”

3. ASK FOR HELP WHEN NECESSARY

Sometimes we just need to accept that we can’t do everything alone and ask for help when we need it. Maybe the reason you’re feeling overwhelmed with emotion is because you’re trying to take on the world on your own. There is no shame or weakness involved in seeking support where necessary!

4. SCHEDULE TIME TO REST

Scheduling specific time to rest each day can help to ensure that you have adequate down time and don’t work yourself into the ground.  Feelings which overwhelm you can arise quickly when we don’t allow ourselves to rest and recharge. Learning to switch off can be hard but the more you do it the easier it becomes! By practicing our meditation technique from part one can also help to learn how to allow the mind to relax.

5. DO SOMETHING YOU LOVE EACH DAY

Not only is rest important, but so is doing something fulfilling each day. If you feel yourself caught up in the mundane and watching life pass you by… do something you love and enjoy!  This can be watching an inspiring movie or making a favourite meal.  You’ll be surprised how much better you feel when you add a little more positivity into your life each day!

6 PRACTICE GRATITUDE

Gratitude is such a simple but powerful tool, which can change your life forever. Incorporate re gratitude in your life to switch your focus to the positive and take control of your own emotions. Get started by creating a gratitude journal and each day enter a couple of things that have happened that day which made you feel grateful, these can be simple things like the weather being sunny or having a telephone chat to a friend.

7. LEARN TO ACCEPT COMPLIMENTS

It may sound silly, but every time you dismiss or deny a compliment you are knocking your own confidence and selling yourself short.  The next time somebody compliments you, try responding with a simple “thank you” and acknowledge how the compliment makes you feel.  You don’t have to necessarily agree (at least not at first) but learning to accept compliments can positively affect the relationship you have with yourself!

8. STOP APOLOGISING FOR EVERYTHING

Similarly, when you apologise for doing nothing other than being you, you’re putting out the idea that who you are isn’t acceptable.  Of course, apologise where it is necessary – but stop apologising when you may feel shame, embarrassment or like a burden. You are worthy and accepted just as you are.

9. LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES

One of the biggest ways we can change the relationship we have with ourselves and care for ourselves emotionally is to see our mistakes as a learning opportunity, rather than a failure.  Mistakes are an inevitable part of life and they help us grow and become better. Each time you make a mistake, acknowledge where you went wrong and work to improve it in the future.  Make sure to forgive yourself too!

10. CREATE A PLAYLIST OF CALMING MUSIC

Creating a calming playlist is a great way to soothe our emotions when we need some TLC. If you feel like you need to take some time to relax then dedicate some time to just sitting and taking in the soothing sounds of the music you love. You can even control your emotions further by creating a playlist for each mood. If heavy metal helps you let off some steam when you’re angry then let it rip!

Paul Abraham lives in Bramley. For more of his weekly wellbeing tips, follow this link.

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