Paul Abraham: Overcoming self-doubt and negative thinking

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Tips: Bramley's Paul Abraham.

By Paul Abraham of

Self-doubt is about ourselves and a fear of making a mistake, none of us were born thinking or knowing, “I can do this” or “I can’t do this” and not every decision we make will be a good one.  

We all make mistakes in judgement at one time or another, but these mistakes help us learn and develop.

Ignore the voice in your head that says you’re going to fail or that you’re not good enough.

If you stop listening, it will get quieter and eventually disappear or in your mind, say or shout something like “No, no, no, we are not going down that road again”

Everyone has times in their life when they feel inadequate and emotionally drained, but by changing your mind-set you can (and will) conquer your self-doubt – leading you to being a much happier, confident you!

Identify your negative thoughts

Some might immediately come to mind, but these thoughts can include.

At Work they may be “I don’t think my boss likes me” or I’m not good enough to get a pay rise or bonus” While at home they can be “I don’t think my partner cares for me”, “I will never move to a better house or area” or “I’m rubbish at cooking”.

How to control negative thoughts

Stop the negative thought immediately.  Once you’ve identified your negative thought, counteract it by saying something positive to yourself. 

In place of saying “I’m having a really crap morning,” say something like, “This morning is a challenge but I will come through it and my day will get better”.

Always try and keep your mind in a positive mind-set.  Another trick is when you have a negative thought, say: “STOP, thanks mind for pointing that out but I have a positive thought instead”.

Remind yourself to keep positive at all times and it will soon become a habit.

Don’t believe what others say about you.

Most of our self-doubt stems from things others have said or have made us feel so stay true to your character and don’t let anyone bring you down.  

Know your strengths and don’t be afraid to showcase them.  

People form opinions of other people based on their own values, strengths, limitations, etc. The way they see you is their own perception, and perception is not fact.


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